Happy Halloween!!!!

Here are a few Halloween pix.......

Ben and the first pumpkin I have ever carved

The headless Horseman & The grim reaper (aren't they a fine pair)

Witch Madeline & Tigger Ben

Ben and my Pumpkin again....

Kadie , Shelly and Missy Big witch little WitchWhen I was at Maddies class today one of the little girls came up to me and said very loudly I know what you are you are a Witch... I said Ya I have been told that before ...

It is almost Halloween...

I am so excited that it is Halloween tomorrow.

It is going to be so much fun ...

Ben is so excited he has been going around the house practicing saying trick or treat..

Halloween has always been my favorite Holiday.

I will post pic of my little ghouls and goblins tomorrow night..

I hope every one has a safe and happy Halloween.

Crafty girl Or Not!!!

I have been a little crafty while Dale has been gone. I am so lonely and board with out him..

So I have to fill my lonely nights with out him doing something creative so I don't miss him so much.. Well I made these great blocks along with several of our young women from church. I think they turned out so cute...

I also made a few more LO and hope to make a few more tonight... I love creating LO knowing that one day my grand kids will see them and say ""gee grandma my mom or dad really looked like that..""" I know my kids love seeing pic of Dale and I wen we were little.

The adventures of Ben......

Yesterday Ben Had a little accident He fell off the couch and hit his head on the door and split his little head open. Poor Kadie had to take care of him until I could get home. She did such a great job at keeping him calm. ( She is going to be a great mom one day)

I took him to the emergency room The glued his head back together and all is well now!!

Today Ben got a hold of my camera and was taking a few pic . I was intrigued by the way they looked. The View of the room looks so different from his height than mine. I think he did a great job taking the pic. for a 3 year old.

Snow Baby....

Madeline is haveing way too much fun in the snow!!!

I took these pic of Madie yeasterday!!!

She made alittle snow man she could play with.

Deep thoughts Who is Jennifer...

I have been up since 2 am unable to get back to sleep. I have so many deep thoughts running trough my head. (It's all Dales fault. LOL) The other day we had this conversation about my blog. He was pointing out some of things I have written in my post To him in my perspective I seem a little shallow in the things I write ( shallow my words not his) So I reread some of my old post and yeah They are mostly about me and all my vanity. I thought is this a bad thing no not necessarily. I just think it is me being goofy. That's why I write this blog to share all the mundane silliness of my every day ordinary life. After all do I really want to expose my deep emotional feelings to the world? Heck No !!!! That would be way to uncomfortable to both me and the world. I like being the self centered fashion diva. After all when I play that role it hides the deep emotional pain that I carry in side.


I think about how much my life has changed in the last 2 years. I think often about the Jennifer I was before I lost William . I loved that girl so much and wish some times I was her again. My life was dang near perfect I had 7 beautiful healthy children a wonderful relationship with my husband I was spiritually in the right place I had great friends a great social life. The most important thing I new who I was.


Now here I am 2 years later trying to find who I am again ,Sometimes I think it is so unfair that I have to go true this journey again. I think for me and the people around me playing the sallow fashion girl is easier than dealing with all the pain I really feel in side, Any good therapist would see right true my insecurities and would say that girl has problems.





I think the point I am trying to make is I need to dig deep again and not be afraid to be who I am. I think I need to take down the walls I have built sense William had died . I need to have an emotional make over . I need to relies that I am different now and it's OK It's OK for me to be sad it's OK for me to be mad and it's even OK when I get depressed. I am not perfect I never was. I think now as I am writing this maybe my life was not as perfect as I thought it was 2 years ago maybe it was just that I was happier not having known such a sever loss. What is that saying ignorance is bliss . Well I am no longer ignorant But I believe I can find my bliss again.


After all I am so blessed I have 8 amazing children a wonderful husband and Best of all a good relation ship with my Heavenly Father.


So I guess if I really think about it I have every thing I had before I lost William . Other than I live her in Alaska and I had to start all over again finding my place in the world. HMMM self therapy maybe I feel so different because my whole world as I new it was taken away from me all at once. Hmm something to ponder.( This really is a revaluation and not me being silly)





My brain is filling a little lighter and so is my heart . Dale I want you Know when you read this that I am not sallow or vain that It is just a facade to hide my feeling Kinda like when you are sarcastic. (Remember Sallow Is my word) this is not to make you feel bad I was not mad at what you said and in fact I never gave it a moments thought until 2 am this morning. You just gave me a lot of food for thought. I want you to know I am grateful you said what you said and thanks saying it constructively instead of a destructively . I believe you said this because you wanted me to see how someone else reading this blog may view me that may not know who I really am.

So i guess this as good of place as any to end this entry so hopefully from now on I can be a little more open and a little less silly.

Hugs to all...

I thought I was going to cry..

Yesterday I was scrap booking and I was almost done with This layout of Shelly I was really pleased with how it was looking. Shelly came home from school and i showed her what I created and she said I don't like it . I then asked her what she didn't like about it . She said she did not like the way her hair looked in the pic.she then said she liked everything else about the LO.

I then had this not so bight idea and asked her if she wanted to write the journaling part. She said sure that would be fun. I new what ever she wrote would have some dry humor in it but that's just Shelly. What I did not expect was that she did not know how to use the pen . It is a Galaxy marker and the ink is very light at first she did not know that and she started to make dots all around the pic. I came in the room to see if she was done , I was so upset when I saw all the dots I could just feel the tears starting to rise . She said don't worry I will fix it. After she wrote the journaling and made yet more dots the Layout looked just fine . It would not have been the way i would have done it but in the end does that really matter. I was just proud that I did not yell at her and that I did not become angry. I remember thinking isn't scrap booking all about preserving and keeping the memories.. From now on every time I see the Layout I will remember Shelly saying it's OK Mom it's just Art and you can make it the way that you want not the way that you think everyone else will like it... She then smiled and said those rare 4 words teenagers use I love you mom....That there was worth the whole moment....

Ps. I miss and love you Dale...

Childhood memories

My sister sent me pix. the other day of Neuschwanstein castle in Germany,

The memories just kept flowing from my childhood.

I grew up in Germany and my mother was always taking us to castles and museums.

I think she took us to every place the base had tours. I cant remember a Saturday that we weren't exploring Europe from the time I was 6 to 11. It was so much fun!!!

This is a pic of my niece Hannah She is the same age that I was when I went on the tour of this castle.

My sister said the tour was the same as it was over 20 years ago . She said it was neat seeing her daughter experience the same thing she did at this age.

This is a pic of Lenderhof . You can kinda she the fountain in the pic. I remember as a child running down the stairs to look at the fountain and pool of water. It is a very long pool I remember thinking it would be fun to be able to go ice skating on in the winter.

Thanks Crys for sending the pix and letting me remember some fun childhood memories.

I Love you Dale.. :)

Snow men and the winter moon

Yesterday we woke up to a descent amount of snow on the ground . My kids were so excited to be able to go sledding and to build a snow man. Witch they did both yesterday . In the words of Garrett "Mom we totally slid down some narley hills" LOL

The veiw from our windowwas just breath takeinglast night. At dusk we looked out the window and saw the most beautiful moon complementing our lovely snow capped mountains.

I am grateful for the pleasure of seeing them everyday and I never get sick of them it's always like looking at a new painting. ( it beats going to Ross any day)

In the words of Ben "I am glad Jesus made mountains for Benny he must love me" He always says look at my mountains they are so peddy. That to me is worth never going to Ross again .

I am glad we chose to move here to Alaska and I am grateful for the beauty and the people that I get to see every day. Jesus must love me.

I am not sure if I like card kits

So I gave this card kit a try and I am not sure if I like it or not .

I don't think that I liked the fact that it is not my own idea.

I like to be a little more creative than just fallowing a pattern.

They just look a little strange to me...

Or maybe it is just that I am just a little strange.

Well I better make my shopping list and get on with my day .

Alaskan skies...

I love the way The sky looks here when the sun is setting .

I just can't believe how breathtaking they are.

They are so serene and peaceful.

Now this is what the song America means by purple mountains Majesty.

I never thought much about the verse until I saw my first purple mountain.

It is so beautiful and breath taking these pix don't even do the colors justice.

Happy!!!

I just finished this LO I think it turned out way cute.

I had a lot of fun making it..

I love the way Robbie and Garrett are not smiling trying too look too cool to get there pix taken. Then there is Maddie she is smiling like a chipmunk.. I love it!

I just cant believe how big my kids are getting . I am glad that Shaina was so kind to show me the ropes of scrap booking. Now I am addicted.

How many lick's does it take .......

To get to the center of a Tootsie pop?????



Shelly will tell you..Not 1 not 2 not 3 or 4 it took....
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A whopping 806 licks .....WOW that's all?

You Go Shelly!!!!!

Thanks to all that lit candles

Thanks to those of you who lit a candle in honor of William today .

I am grateful that I have good friends and family who have supported me true the loss of William. I want to Thank all of you who listen to me tell stories about William and exspecaily for all of you who met William and loved him while he was here.

I felt his spit strong in our home last night it was so strong . I love when I am able to feel him close to me .

This candel is the one my sister Nacy lit for William..

Thanks sister

Something near and dear to my heart.

I want to invite all my family and friends to join me and our family in lighting a candle in remembrance of William and any other sweet baby that you may know that has left this earth too soon

The First snow of the season..

It was such a beautiful day yesterday it was sunny and bright and it did not seem very cold.

So it was a big surprise to wake up to snow covering the ground.

Spookey out side.

The wind is howling and the leaves are blowing and it is very overcast out side.

When you look at the mountains out side our windows it looks like a scene from scooby doo.

Ben keeps jumping in my arms every time the wind howls saying scary scary mommy.

He covers his ears and closes his eyes it is sad but cute.

I just love Halloween time it always makes me feel like a kid again.

I can hardly wait to get all dressed up and have some fun!!!

I have Been Tagged!

Here We go Shaina Girl!


5 things I was doing 10 years go

1. I was 6 months pregnant with Robbie Our first boy!

2. I was Shelly's Joy school Teacher

3. I was room Mom for Kadies 1st grade class( She is a senior now)

4.I was getting ready for Halloween.

5. I was living in Kansas

5 things on my to do list today.

1.Pay my dentist bill

2. get Milk

3. Do the laundry

4.Make something yummy for diner

5. paint my toe nails

5 snacks I enjoy

1.Godiva Chocolate

2. chips and peach and mango salsa

3.Carmel Apple dip

4.onion rings

5.vegges and dip


5 songs I know the lyric to

1.Girl Friend

2. Girls just want to have fun

3.Foot loose

4. Any primary song

5.your still the One

5 of my bad habits

1.I talk to much

2. I give way to much information

3. I eat too much junk food.

4. I procrastinate.

5.I yell some times (OK too much)

5 Things I would do as a Millionaire

1. I would take a family Vacation .

2.I would build a big house so all my kids could have there own room

3.I would travel the world.

4. I would get a boob job!!!

5. I would go shopping at Ross All The time!!


5 Things I will never ware again

1. Maternity clothes

2. Ugly clothes

3. Pasties

4. something that was not in style.

5. A G- string (well maybe just a few more times)


5 of my favorite toys
I better not name any of the naughty ones


1. All my clothes ( I love playing dress up)

2. Dale

3.The computer

4.My Beads and jewelry making stuff

5. All my scrap booking stuff


The people I am going to Tag ;)


1.Beth

2. Teri

3. Lisa

4. Tracy

5. Shea


OK that was fun !! Maybe a little too reveling.
Can't wait to see what you guys write

I'm on a Roll!!

So I think we all know what we are going to be for Halloween.

I just need to pick up a few odds and ends.. To finish the costumes . I just love Halloween.

I went to Freddies and stopped buy the clothes and jewelry section .I found a Dress for Kadie for Christmas and a new necklace for me . It is similar to one of the ones I lost when we moved here. So needless to say I was a happy girl!!! I found a shirt I fell in love with it was on sale and I was going to buy it until I saw the big foundation stain on the collar ands of course there was not another one in my size.

GRRRR Small towns..OK that was not fair it happened to me at Ross all the time.

I guess I will just have to keep on my quest to find wonderful inexpensive clothes here in Alaska.

I know I can do it so stay tuned and see what I buy next...

OK now I sound like a shopaholic..

So what is everyone

Being for Halloween???
Some of my kids know what they want to be but not all of them.

So far we have Robbie as a Rock star, Garrett is going to be a Robber, Kadie is going to be Harry Potter ,Mylissa a pirate and that is as far as we have gotten. Normally by June I have every thing bought and made . I cant believe it is already the 9th of October and I am not ready for Halloween. (Yikes) I guess I better get on the Ball....

OK I AM GIVING ALASKA A CHANCE

Everyone knows I love living here I just don't like to shop for clothes here.

I decided to quit whining and do something about it. My goal is to find fashionable good quality clothes for not a lot of money( yes here in Alaska. ) The goal is 2 to 3 new outfits a month with out spending over$ 50.dollars I am a great bargain shopper so I know I can do it. (With out my Buddie Ross)

This weekend I got 3 shirts and one dress and only spent 32.50. Boy did it feel good to get new clothes I felt like a little kid on Christmas morning. It was such a rush (Now i sound like a drug addict) As you cant tell I am happy and fell like my old self again.



This is the dress I got this weekend I spent a whopping $10.52 on. Whoo

It is just so stinking cute. The original price$.55

OK so this is not the best pic of me, My arm and hand looks super huge. Plus I need some bling on my wrist..

I'll just blame the bad pic on the weather It was so cold out and I was freezing. I thin it was about 22 degrees (Man I am so white I really need to get a tan.)

OK so I am kinda a dork!

First let me say thanks for all the great Quotes that you have sent.
I think I am going to put the one Rosa suggested on the wall above my stairs.
A day with out laughter is a day waisted (Charlie Chaplin)
I have not yet found the right one for my living room. So keep the suggestions coming.




I made this LO of Robbie and Garrett. I was very pleased on how it turned out until I realised I spelt surprise wrong. Which is kinda funny because that's just typical of me


So now I am in this dilemma do fix it and add the R or do I keep it the way it is?

I need You'r help!!

So I am looking or a great quote to put on my wall and I need My friends, family and blog buddies to help me find the right one. Here are some quotes I love but I am not sure I want them on my Wall.

By the way the wall that I am going to put it on is my liveing room wall. So everyone will see it. I would like it to make pepole think and go HMM when they see it and be inspiered at the same time.

Yes I am asking alot!!

Ok now here are the Quotes.

The best and most beautiful things in the world can not be scene nor touched... but are felt in the heart.. ( Hellene Keller)



A baby is God opinion that the world should go on..(Carl Sandburg)





It is not a bad thing that children should occasionally, put there parents in there place...(Colette)



To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order we must, first put the family in order, to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life's: we must first set our hearts right. ( Confucius)



Can't wait to see what you all come up with...

5 Things you may not know about me!

1. I am a GH (General hospital) junkie.

2. I am very scared of the Dark.

3.I love to try new foods. (I rarely order the same thing when i eat at the same restaurant)

4.I did not get my drivers licence until I was 23.

5.I slept with my special blanket until I was married.

Now that I have told you some new things about me it's your turn to tell me something I may not know about you all my blog friends and family.
Can't wait to read your comments.